Starting today I’ve decided start to embracing ME! I’m sick of depression and low self-confidence. Of feeling like crap and not wanting to look in the mirror at myself. I’m going to try and do things every day to embrace ME: what I am, who I am and learn to love it all.
If you’ve been reading my blog for a long time, you will have read about my battles with my weight. I may be confident in some aspects of my life, but body image, not so much. I don’t think there is one part of my body that I like. The only way to fix this is to lose weight, I know that, and have been on a constant weight loss journey for, well, pretty much all of my life.
I have had some successes, the best one being the 5 stone ish that I lost in 2011. Even though I was still plus-size, I felt so good about myself. However, for one reason or another, and I’m not really sure why and how, I managed to slowly, over the course of about 18 months, start to put the weight back on. As I did, my confidence dropped and I couldn’t pull myself out of the slump.
I started 2014 with a “I’m going to do it AGAIN” and so far, have lost a stone. Not as much as I would have hoped, but, I’ve also gone back to my hours worth of Zumba several times a week, which I do at home, and for me is the biggest achievement, because at the start of the year I couldn’t do 5 minutes without wanting to stop.
I keep looking at photos of me from 2011, and whilst to others I don’t look “small”, to me, I do. Before I lost that weight I was a size 34/36 – buying clothes was the biggest struggle, so I just kept to the few things that had been in my wardrobe for years, swamped in shapeless jumpers and tops. After losing 5 stone, I was buying clothes that were a size 24 – sometimes even a 22! To me, that was amazing! All my old clothes were binned. I never want to buy that size clothing again. Ever.
However, I’ve got in the rut now of making do with the clothes that I’ve had since 2011 – some don’t fit like they used to – some not at all. I punish myself continually about my size and sadly I’m the sort of person who will only buy new clothes “when I’ve lost weight” or “when I’ve dropped a dress size” or “I’ll wear that when I’ve lost weight” yet, in the mean time, I’m frumping about in old clothes, which don’t quite fit as they should which in turn makes me feel worse about myself and the way I look.
I’ve been reading a lot of plus-size fashion blogs recently, with women of all shapes and sizes, and it’s made me stop and think, if they can have the confidence, why can’t I? So I started buying clothes that were out of my comfort zone. I’ve had my eye on some really pretty skater dresses from Yours for a while now. Looking at them, thinking, could I wear that? Would I be comfortable in that? Would it even fit me?
The lovely people at Yours offered to send me something from their new clothing line to review. I immediately went to the dresses, and in particular the coral and black daisy flocked peter pan collar skater dress. The largest size that they do in this dress is 26/28. I’d say I’m more of a size 30 even a 32 at the moment – it really does depend on the shop and the style of clothing. But I took the chance, although thinking it probably won’t go anywhere near or by me…how wrong I was!
The stretchy material that the dress is made from, fit me just fine. I’ve got boobage, so I was worried about the trim around the waist area, but I just got away with it! When I put it on and looked in the mirror, I thought – wow, what a difference the dress makes to my shape. It nips in at the waist, has a delightful flare at the help which hides the belly. The collar is really cute and the whole design gives it a really nice 50/60s feel.
The colour is coral, which is like a peachy-orange colour and is just lovely. The black daisy print is flocked, which makes the dress feel really luxurious.
I’m not a big fan of sleeveless because I hate my arms. But I counter that by wearing a shrug of some sort. I also tend to have a problem with some dresses in that the holes for the arms seem too big for me and you can just see in the photo above where I’ve taken off my cardi, the way the material bunches up a little bit. I’m sure that’s more to do with my shape than any fault of the dress though.
I’ve got ducks disease (my arse is too close to the ground!) so, because I’m short (5’4″) and also have short legs, the skirt of the dress sits below my knees. The model on the Yours website shows the dress fitting above her knees. But then, she’s probably 5’10” and a size 14 I stand corrected, I’ve been reliably informed (by Yours) that the model is an 18 :D (I hope a 14, because that’s the smallest size Yours sells clothes in; 32 is the largest) so what the dress looks like on her, is not indicative of what it would look like on a size 26/28 short arse fat chick like me!
Everything about this dress is not me at all – it’s got a bold print, it’s fitted, it’s a colour other than black, it’s sleeveless…yet, I love it!
For the purposes of this photoshoot I slung on an old cardi shrug, which I know looks really tatty in the photographs! I need to get myself some new shrugs for this year. I also wore some black tights and heels. I really don’t do bare legs – something else I may have to overcome, but one thing at a time! I also put on my favourite pair of dress up heels which again, I’ve had for years.
This dress would be perfect to wear to a wedding, and Yours also sell it in black and white too. Off the back of this review, I went out and bought myself another skater dress…I’ll share that in another post.
It will take me a while to lose weight, so in the meantime I’m learning it is important to love myself at every step of the way. It’s time to get rid of the old frumpy clothes and get in with the new! Just wearing this dress made a big difference to the way I feel about myself, and it’s amazing that clothes can do that!