Happy New Year!
We are just shy of a week into 2018 and I thought I would share my plans for the year ahead.
I am not creating new years resolutions – they’re always the same any way – do this, do that, blah, blah, blaaaargh. Year in; year out… always the same. Enough really is enough! This year I’ve decided that I will have a word of the year, that I will be able to focus on, and use as my mantra as the days, weeks and months go by. My word of the year is change.
Word Of The Year
Change; it feels like a big scary word doesn’t it? Most of us are creatures of habit, and don’t like things to change. But the penny for me dropped, when a friend mentioned this quote to me…
The definition of insanity is doing the same thing again and again, and expecting different results. – Anon
For the past 3/4 years (it seems) I’ve been on the same merry-go-round. Just going round and round in circles. Do exactly the same thing, and hoping things will change. And they haven’t. And yes, it has actually driven me “insane” – to the point of a very deep depression, and anxiety. I have felt my life getting worse, and at my age, that is not a place where I want to be.
I belong to a fab blogging group, and we have all chosen a word of the year – mainly for our blogs and online business; but also for personal growth. I feel like change hits the nail on the head for all aspects of my life.
I could write for days about the past few years, and all the things I have wanted to change, but, for one reason or another didn’t. If you delve into my blog archives you’ll see plenty of personal posts where I touch upon the subject. Retrospective is good, but sometimes it is best to just leave the past in the past, as it cannot be changed now.
What I can change is my here and now, and the future. And that is exactly what I plan to do…
I really am an ‘all or nothing’ kind of girl. I always have been, and probably always will! That’s why I’m not doing things by halves with the change I want in my life – it really is a mid-life overhaul!
Here are the aspects of my life that I want to see good change:
- my blog
- my physical health
- my mental wellbeing
- my social life
- my home
I’ve had pretty much the same sort of layout on my blog for several years now and it’s time to change that up! I will make the changes as quickly and stealthily as I can so as not to leave you with too much downtime.
- There will be more structure – set days for recipes, printables etc
- A party idea (with printables set) each month
- Getting ahead of the seasonal events (I have a habit of leaving it a little bit late!)
- Stocking The Shop with more printables, and tangible products too!
If you’re a long time reader of my blog you’ll know that weight [loss] is a battle I’ve been fighting my whole life. I can hand on heart say that I have done nothing but try to lose weight my whole life (from around the age of 10) and if anything, all that it has ever done to me is make me gain weight in the long run. How do I know that? Because I’m living that life right now.
Oh how my health has suffered over the past 3 years or so. I’ve gained more weight in the past 3 years than I did when I was pregnant with my son 19 years ago. Because of the weight gain, I couldn’t exercise like I used to, which cause me more weight gain. I’m at a point now where I can’t walk much more than a few minutes without having to stop and sit down because I’m breathless or because my back and legs are in agony. On top of that my blood pressure is high again, and the doctor is trying to bring it under control with medication. I was also diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes last year, and I want to work on reversing that before it gets really serious (i.e., needing insulin) Exercise will help with both of these conditions.
I am a serial yo-yo dieter – and that’s the worst thing you can do for your body – or so I have read. So that has to be the biggest change for me in 2018 – no more yo-yo dieting. All of us in this household could do with a diet change, and so these will be our personal guidelines to bring our health back into check:
- Reducing our portion sizes
- Avoiding processed and take-away foods (thus avoiding excess salt, sugar, fat)
- Going back to meal planning, and meal prepping
- Consuming less meat
- Increasing our step counts each day
- Going back to swimming (I used to swim 5 days a week)
- Start doing Zumba again (I used to do this several times a week too)
I really don’t need anyone telling me I should and shouldn’t be doing. I know people mean well, but advice is not welcomed here! I’ve lived in this body long enough to know what works for it, and what doesn’t. I won’t be counting calories – because of years of doing it, I know it doesn’t mean a thing for me. I can eat like a mouse one week and gain weight, then eat for Britain the following week and lose weight. Or vice versa.
I don’t need a scale or a tape measure to tell me if I have lost or gained weight – I can feel it in myself and in the things I do. So not being a slave to the scales is another big change for me.
Now, I am fully aware this huge section I’ve written about health sounds awfully like a resolution. And in some ways, maybe it is – I’ll hold my hand up to that. But I have had ENOUGH of being this size. The world isn’t made for fat people as it is – but try being super fat like I am, and it’s a whole other ball game like you wouldn’t believe.
I’m not putting a time scale on my weight loss, I am making changes to my existing way of eating/exercising to make changes in my body. In turn those changes will lead to change in other aspects of my life…
Wellbeing & Social Life
My weight has a direct knock on affect to my mental wellbeing. I hit my worst bought of depression in 2016, and have been suffering from social anxiety for several years now. I only go outside if I really, really have to, and then usually with my husband, or son. I would describe myself as a prisoner in my own home these days, and I would say suffering from a sort of form of agoraphobia. I have this fear of going out when it is dark (for some strange reason) and I find it very hard to get outside if it is dark outside. I don’t really want this to be much longer of a post as I feel I have already dwelled too much on the past in the previous section, but here are some changes I plan on making to improve my wellbeing and social life
- Doing things that can soothe my mind – colouring in, learning how to letter, reading
- Making time to look after myself – putting on make up, doing my hair, painting my nails – things I used to do regularly, but rarely do these days
- Going outside at least once a day – even if it is out into the garden
- Stepping away from the computer and having an actual lunch break
- Cutting down on screen time in the evenings
- Going out at least once a month with my husband
- Eating as a family when we can
- Making time to see friends – or have them come over
- Making time to see family – or have them come over
- Seeking some sort of counselling/therapy
- Not letting everything build up/keep it all to myself
Our house… ugh… it’s just, not good. At all. I am shamefully embarrassed about it and we have truly let things go in here. I really need one of those DIY shows to come and just sort the whole place out! Ideally I would like us to move – but even then, we’d have to get here shipshape before putting it on the market.
- Finish decorating our bedroom
- Put in a new kitchen
- Turn the garden into a lovely outdoor space to entertain in the summer
And that is really about it – so a LOT of change to be made in so many aspects of my life! My main focus though, as selfish as it sounds, is myself. I’ve given a lot of me to others over the years, and in doing so I haven’t looked after me, and that needs to change.